Cops Like Cookies (Not Just Donuts)
Updated: Aug 18, 2020
This morning we cashed in one of our winnings from a silent auction held at a PTO event. We won “lunch with a Shelton Police Officer". Since we couldn't arrange to have a lunch, we settled for a tour of the Shelton Police Department. Ev (11), Jess (9) and I (ageless) were fortunate to have our tour guide be Officer Ken, a School Resource Officer who knew Evan from his school. To show our appreciation for the department taking time to give us a tour, we arrived with two dozen homemade chocolate chip cookies.
Our tour started in the dispatch center. We were at the police station for a total of five minutes when Jessica exclaimed, "I thought cops liked donuts!" Thankfully, Officer Ken laughed and I tried to do my best cover up and corrected her by saying that the police officers also like cookies.
The dispatch staff was kind enough to show us what happens when an emergency call comes in by simulating a real call. Evan was so excited and started firing off questions. "What does this button do? Can I press it? Can I take a call? Why not? Okay, so then what happens? Can I take a call? Please? Why not?" Thankfully, the dispatch team were patient and able to keep up with the rapid fire of questioning.
Officer Ken brought us to the booking room to view the fingerprinting station where we learned if I ever get arrested I won't have to scrub black ink off my fingers because everything is digital now. We then moved to the jail cells where we learned that bologna sandwiches are the meal of the day every day for every meal when you get arrested and have to sit in a holding cell at the Shelton P.D. (That was enough to make me scared straight.)
While in jail, Evan's interrogation started up again. "Why isn't anyone arrested right now? Can I stay here? Can you lock me up? Do prisoners have to wear uniforms? Where are the keys? Can I see the keys? Can I have the keys? I see there are toilets. Can I go to the bathroom here?" (I'm just looking at Officer Ken thinking you are NEVER going to volunteer for this sh*t ever again, are you?)
We continued on the tour and met the pleasant Sargent Yerzak. He was very kind to the kids and Evan saluted him. While we were in the hallway, Jessica felt the need to compete with her brother in the question asking department. So, out of nowhere decided to revisit the cops like donuts question once again by saying, "Wait. I thought cops just ate donuts, right? Hahaha!" This led to a serious conversation about what "stereotyping" is and why it is very, very bad. (thanks Simpsons! and Ha. Ha.)
Next, we stopped off where the officers practice their tasering skills. Ev was pumped! And the rapid fire of questions started again... "Can I try it?" (No) How many volts? How bad does it hurt? (It hurts bad.) Can you taser me? (Nope)." I was just waiting for him to ask if he could taser Jessica. (Yep!)
After that we entered the shooting range. (Please shoot me with these two and the questions.) Officer Ken showed us the various lighting settings used to simulate real life situations. It wasn't until all the lights were off, that I realized how insanely scary it must be to be a police officer. You need to have amazing reflexes and always be at the ready. I mean, think about that. You can't make a single mistake. Imagine trying to react to a situation while there are blue and red lights flashing in your eyes. Or you hear a shot fired and it's pitch black outside. It gave me real pause and brought me to have another level of respect. (Now, listen, I'm still playing NWA's "F#ck The Police" in my car and that's because that's a damned good song about some crooked ass cops. None of which appear to be in the Shelton P.D. btw.)
On the second part of our tour we met Stryker, a beautiful black German Shepherd from the K-9 unit. Stryker's handler, Officer Dan was originally off duty. But because Officer Ken knew just how much Evan wanted to meet Stryker, he convinced Officer Dan to find someone to watch his two year old son, put on his uniform on an ninety degree day, and bring Stryker to meet Evan. It was above and beyond and we were so appreciative. And Stryker was amazing! He did his job and was a model police dog. The kids would hide an item and then Stryker would be called to sniff it out. There was no fooling this guy. He found each item every time. Stryker was such a sweet and smart dog and he was definitely the highlight of our tour. (Sorry, Officer Ken)
Lastly, Evan was given a ride home in a police car. Surprisingly he sat in the front seat, not in the back. (Let’s keep it that way, kid.) Officer Ken punched it a little on the way out of the police parking lot and I heard Evan scream, "Yea!" Jess and I went home and Evan arrived with Officer Ken about 20 minutes later. I thanked Officer Ken for answering our myriad of questions and for the wonderful tour. He said, "You're welcome." and then handed me a bag of donuts. "Those are for Jessica. Tell her some cops do like donuts."
So today, I do not say F#ck the Police. I say Thank You to the Police for their service. (and for putting up with my two f#ckers!) Thanks Officer Ken, Officer Dan, Stryker and the Shelton Police Department for taking time out of their day to give us a tour and answer well over 500 questions by one super excited kid and his sister.